MOTHERS
of
YESTERDAY
VS
MOTHERS
of
TODAY
Assalamu Alaikum. My dear friends, very soon many people will be celebrating Mother’s Day. In Islam we know that Mother’s Day is not one day out of the year, but it is to be lived and commemorated everyday; because our mother(s) are not there for us for just one day out of the year, but everyday of every year during their lives. “Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him and that you be kind to your parents. Whether one or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of humility, and say: “My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy even as they cherished me in my childhood”. (Quran 17:23-24). These are very powerful words for us to ponder over and make certain that we are obeying these commands. Our mothers are a great source of wisdom, intelligence, experience, knowledge, strength, love and happiness. Each generation of mothers, have had their own experience in life’s journey, some good, some bad. But whether we are young mothers or middle age mothers, or older mothers, we all need to respect, love and appreciate our mothers. No one generation of mothers is better than the other, because if not for the struggles, determination, success and knowledge of one, the successive generation would not have encountered improvement and easier times. Consider the generation of mothers who got up early in the morning prepared a meal for their husband and lunch for the kids, took care of getting their children off to school and as many of us know this is no easy task to accomplish, especially since in those days the average child per household were six and more.
Then they started their household chores many of which involved heavy physical labor without the use of vacuums, swiffers, microwaves, electric stoves, mixers, choppers, coffeemakers, blenders, juicers, and all the other host of appliances we rely on today. For most there were no washers and dryers and wrinkle free materials, no neighborhood dry cleaners, no second cars to go to the store when they ran out of a pantry item. They did not have access to simply order pizza or other takeout food when they were short on time. There were no readily available medicines when they had a headache, allergies, cold, flu, or cramps. At that time, there was no diagnosis for PMS or menopause, so our mothers struggled with these symptoms on their own. Today, at the first sign of any slight ache, pain or discomfort we pop a pill or go to a doctor or complain. When a child got sick, there were not a lot of accessible doctors, hospitals or walk in clinics like there are today. Our mothers were the doctors taking care of their sick child. In case of an emergency, there were no cell phones, very limited land lines and so they had to struggle with the stress of their situation until help got there. Very sadly, many lived with domestic violence, mental abuse etc. Bringing up a family was very hard work, but with Allah’s (SWT) mercy and guidance they survived and are able to pass on their life experience and advice to us, so that they could give us a better life and teach us to be good mothers to our children. Our mothers will always be concerned about us, they will always pray for our well being, they will always give us advice, and they will always “mother” us. Regardless if we believe that we are more knowledgeable, more experienced, more sophisticated, and more educated academically than our mothers; we sorely lack the insight, determination, strength, patience, understanding and wisdom that they utilized in order to survive and nurture their family.
Without doubt, there is no comparison. Despite all our many conveniences and our easy access to support, help and communication, together with the small amount of children that we have, we are always very busy, have less time to pray, less time for our parents, less time for our family, we seem to have more problems, more sicknesses and more complaints, we’re always tired and have much less patience. Our mothers are the true heroes; it was their prayers and struggles and sacrifices that have paved the way for our lives to be easier, and with the help of Allah SWT. So now when they reach the age of senility and infirmity, they are under our care and we must be careful to avoid uttering a word of complaint or anger towards them: “Say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them”. We must choose the right words to say to them, words that will make them feel loved and wanted: “but address them in terms of honor”. Our attitude should be one of respect, humility and obedience. And we must pray for them for the unforgettable favors they have done for us, as they took care of us when we were small and weak: And say “My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy even as they cherished me in my childhood.” May Allah give us the guidance, patience and fortitude to always be kind, caring and loving to our parents, and may He guide and bless our children to show love and kindness towards us also, ameen/ Let us remember that the noble Prophet Muhammad SAW said that Paradise lies at the feet of thy mother; if we want Paradise, let us always be of service to our mothers, Insha Allah.
How beautifully everything is arranged by Allah; as soon as a child enters the world, it finds a mother ready to take care of it.”“
